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Self-Portrait as an Alley

I’ve known coffins coming through and high heels, shoeless men. They carry their own mythologies. They’re aware of a galaxy of knives they used to cut whatever they cut—fibrous or kneaded. Each memory they carry has an underbelly. Each acorn a tree. We alleys can link one side of a street or idea to another. Can punctuate and invent a persona unlike any other alley. That’s me, a windpipe of trash bins and tiaras and the song of a nightingale. I’m fickle. I’m push and shove. I’m a clock of figures and witness. Over and out, from this space to another, feeling the needled rain, the scabs, the shit-faced lover and splayed centipede. I don’t have legs, so I feel lopsided, some days wishing for a lollipop. Other days I’m like a washboard, using Boraxo when what I really want is a moonscape under which I’m wanting hanky-panky with a saxophone as my backdrop. Thinking of crows, I think of absence. It does not make the heart grow fonder. I’m a morgue of dead birds that flew into the skyscraper windows. I opt for the loveseat someone tossed and sleep it off in the rain.

Susan Landgraf received an Academy of American Poets’ Laureate award. Books include CrossingsThe Inspired PoetWhat We Bury Changes the Ground; and Other Voices. More than 400 poems have appeared in Prairie Schooner, Poet Lore, Margie, Nimrod, Rattle and others. She taught at Highline College and Shanghai Jiao Tong University.

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